Journal Entries for Teri Lynn
NEW YEAR'S GREETINGS
December 31st, 2011 11:20 am MST
WISHING ALL OF YOU WONDERFUL LADIES A MOST FEMTASTIC NEW YEAR. MAY ALL YOUR FEMININE DREAMS COME TRUE AND MAY YOU BE BLESSED BEYOND MEASURE!
Christmas Chatter
December 9th, 2011 6:36 pm MST
New Novel Published
December 6th, 2011 5:35 pm MST
Hi Girls,
Finally, my new novel has been published. You may purchase it from: Crossdressing TV Fiction - Mags Inc
When they reached the Halls, Ann said, “Mark, Janie; you missed something this morning.” Mark & Janie looked at each other with puzzled looks. “What did we miss?” asked Mark, with a serious and concerned look. Ann responded, “Mark, Janie; I’d like you to meet ERICA, my spouse.” The look on the Hall’s faces was priceless! For what seemed like minutes, neither one was able to speak. Ann came to their rescue. “While you catch your breath, why don’t you drive over and join us at our house for dessert,” she offered. “We’ll do just that,” replied Janie.
At Erica’s house, Ann explained how she always wished that she could get Eric to look a bit nicer and get him out of his Wranglers, into something trendy, but that because of his career, he seemed impossible to budge out of his conservative mode. She explained that he came home one day, wearing a blouse-shirt, because he spilled ink on his shirt and one of the women got a shirt-blouse for him from a thrift shop – an emergency substitute. Ann explained that the minute she saw his shirt-blouse, she liked how it made him look more refined. Ann continued to fill them in on all the details, up to the day they met in Las Vegas and then told them about the office Halloween role-switching and dress-up day. Ann then confided that once she got into the spirit of the upcoming contest, she enjoyed seeing Eric in a feminine style, more and more.
Erica sat there, speechless, but inside she was experiencing a deep satisfaction. Their closest friends were now aware of “his” crossdressing. Regardless of why they thought that ‘she’ crossdressed, they now knew and Erica knew that ‘she’ didn’t have to hide it from them anymore. What a relief that was! Erica felt free – freedom to be a woman!
_________________________________________________
Erica just had to speak. “Mark, you don’t know how much that means to me! We’ve been friends for a long time and you were the last one I wanted to meet in this mode, because I was afraid of your reaction. This all started innocently with an accident at the office, when a co-worker offered me a shirt-blouse when I ruined my shirt with ink. Then the coming Halloween party allowed me to continue to delve into my new encounter with feminine apparel. As I got into the spirit of the Halloween competition, my spirit was awakened to an inside feeling I had managed to suppress until now – that I had yearnings of femininity. I’m so glad for your openness and acceptance and yes, you will most likely see Erica at church in the future. And if Janie ever suggests to you, that you try something new, like wearing a blouse around the house, don’t balk at her suggestion. You may find a new fulfillment that you didn’t even know existed.” “Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind. If I thought I would look half as good as you, maybe Janie could tempt me with such a suggestion,” replied Mark.
Then it was Janie’s turn to speak. “Ann, if it means anything to you, I must say that when I first saw Erica in Las Vegas, I hoped that you would continue with Erica’s feminization. I could tell from the look on ‘her’ face, that dressing as a woman was not just a Las Vegas-event. I saw in ‘her’ eyes that ‘she’ was truly enjoying being perceived as a woman, although today she looks a million times better – so feminine, so sexy, that she even fooled us.
Post-Halloween surprise
November 2nd, 2011 11:47 pm MDT
Hi Girls,
Halloween is always a great opportunity to gently introduce your family and friends to your TG side. My wife and I attended a Halloween party, each dressed as the other. She was dressed as a Western Sheriff and I was dressed as "his" Secretary.
I have a very conservative friend, who always claimed to be a Liberal, but other than who he votes for, his values would more corrective identify him as a conservative. At work, he was our biggest macho-man, not only in size but in testosterone. He had no use for TG people and was not afraid to make it known. Well, in the past several years, he has suffered from cancer, had some severe operations and started on Prozac. He is now a changed person. Suddenly, he has compassion for people, does not pretend to be the old "tough guy" he used to be and really likes people.
I thought that this was a good time to introduce him to my fem-persona. My wife and I have dinner with my friend and his wife, each month. Just before the weekend, I called him to remind him of our dinner (he's getting a bit forgetful). I asked what he was doing for Halloween. Then I told him that my wife and I are going to a Halloween Role-reversal party. He bought it hook-line-&-sinker. I told him how we would dress. I said that I would think about sending him a picture, if he promised not to laugh me out-of-town. He promised.
Yesterday, before our dinner, I e-mailed him the picture. He commented that he thought I had great legs and that I look better as a woman than as a man. I thanked him and told him that if he ever was invited to a masquerade ball, etc, and wanted to go as a woman, I could refer him to the makeup artist who did my makeup. (Actually, I did my own makeup but I wasn't ready yet to tell him that). My friend kept telling me what a great job the makeup person did. I'll take that as a compliment. My friend also said that in my fem-mode, I reminded him of Tootsie. I've had several people tell me that over the years.
OK, now that I've told my friend that I dressed as a woman and he didn't stone me, I will talk about my "adventure" a little bit each time we meet. I'm going to dare him to go to a New Year's Eve Masquerade Ball as a woman and see how he reacts. Eventually, I will tell him that I've really "dressed" before - for a long time, in fact. And before I know it, another person will have been educated about TG's, crossdressers, etc.
So, my challenge to you is to find at least one person in your circle-of-friends or family and introduce that person to your fem-persona, then educate them about TG's.
Yes, I'll let you make that a New Year's Resolution.
Cheers
The Great Opportunity Day
October 11th, 2011 8:31 pm MDT
Hi Girls,
It's the month for your best opportunity to get out in fem-mode. Many of you may remember my story about my Halloween adventure, several years ago. You may never think that getting out in fem-mode, even for Halloween, will ever happen, but if you make specific plans and make it your goal to get out, it can happen.
I keep reading about so many of you (and some are really good looking - way better, by a country mile than me) who have never been out in public, in fem-mode. You have no clue how much of your feminine life you are missing. I urge you - no beg you - make plans this month to get out in fem-mode!
As we all know, Halloween is the one day (week or weekend) on which anything goes. Some restaurants/night clubs have "dress-up' events. Some workplaces have a costume day. And there are other events - church or school events for the kids so they have a safe place to go, instead of going "Trick or Treating" on the street.
With Halloween being on a Monday this year, it will prolong the celebration. At work, it will be celebrated on Monday. At restaurants/bars/clubs, it will be celebrated from Friday through Monday, because they want to attract the extra business. Churches may offer an alternative Harvest Celebration on any of those days. So your opportunities, to "dress" will be extended this year.
Halloween - what a great day for those who just want to have some fun - and of course, for crossdressers. Yes, you can wear any costume you wish - even dress as a woman - and no one will question it. I'm not suggesting that you go out looking really bad - like a man-in-a-dress. No, then you would get some snickers. I am suggesting that you go dressed as a nice representation of a woman. Depending on where you work, you can dress as a Secretary, Nurse, Boss's wife, Housewife, Banker, Lawyer, Doctor, Teacher, etc, etc -- like any other woman.
Wherever you work, pick a position that is held by a woman and dress as her. To make it easier, start talking about a Halloween party at your workplace. Suggest that everybody dress as someone else. Suggest that changing roles would make it more of a challenge and suggest that you have prizes for the best imitator. That would give you the perfect excuse to look the best as a woman, without being questioned as to why you look so nice as a woman. Oh, for my excuse, as to why I looked so nice, ( and because my wife didn't want her co-workers to get suspcious) I said that I had my make-up done at a studio because I didn't know how to do it. No - no one quetion that my arms and legs were shaved. I was so worried that I would be grilled, but read my story and see how well the entire "appearance" went.
Another theme that you could suggest, at work, is that everyone pick a well-known person (actor, public figure, politician, etc) and dress as them, with the men having to pick a female figure and the women having to pick a male figure to imitate. (Now, why didn't I think of this while I was still working???)
OK, enough ideas. Now get yourself started planning - you only have 20 days left.
If you need further encouragement, and haven't read my "Halloween Adventure", fe-mail me and I'll send it to you.
And once the "ice-is-broken", who knows what doors that will open for you to dress in fem-mode during other times of the year - Mardi Gras, etc - or no special reason.
Enjoy the Treat of your life!
Teri
A TG Veteran's Funeral
July 28th, 2011 5:05 pm MDT
Yesterday was another first for me, but more importantly - a Memorial for a great TG friend, a Veteran of the USAF - SAC. After CC, a TG friend, told me that Linda's family invited us to the funeral and said it would be fine if we attended, dressed en-fem, I decided that I would go. Actually, forgive me, but I had decided to go as "Teri" before I got the news from CC. I am at the point where I feel more female than male and certainly enjoy looking female. For the past few years, I've been living mostly as a woman. Oh, I have my days when family meetings, etc, require that I appear in drab-mode, but aside from that, I'm "Teri" 24/7. When out in public, I don't announce to anyone what my genetic gender status is. I present myself as a woman and what they see is what they get. If they figure me out, so be it. If show any indication that they think I'm TG, I just give them a big smile. OK, where does all this lead?
First En-fem RV trip across the US
May 18th, 2011 3:51 pm MDT
Crabcake time.jpg
Outfit for seeing The Phantom.jpg
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Outfit I wore for The Phantom.jpg
Vegas Girl.jpg
A tired Vegas Pawn Star.jpg
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High School Reunion - En-fem
October 12th, 2010 3:07 pm MDT
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Halloween Opportunities
October 2nd, 2010 1:56 pm MDT
Hi Girls, it's the month for your best opportunity to get out in fem-mode. Many of you may remember my story about my Halloween adventure, several years ago. You may never think that getting out in fem-mode, even for Halloween, will ever happen, but if you make specific plans and make it your goal to get out, it can happen.
I keep reading about so many of you (and some are really good looking - way better, by a country mile than me) who have never been out in public, in fem-mode. You have no clue how much of your feminine life you are missing. I urge you - no beg you - make plans this month to get out in fem-mode!
As we all know, Halloween is the one day (week or weekend) on which anything goes. Some restaurants/night clubs have "dress-up' events. Some workplaces have a costume day. And there are other events - church or school events for the kids so they have a safe place to go, instead of going "Trick or Treating" on the street.
With Halloween being on a Sunday this year, it will prolong the celebration. At work, it will be celebrated on Friday, because most people don't work on Sat. At restaurants/bars/clubs, it will be celebrated from Friday through Sunday, because they want to attract the extra business. At school, they will celebrate it on Friday. Churches may offer an alternative Harvest Celebration on any of those days. So your opportunities, to "dress" will be extended this year.
Halloween - what a great day for those who just want to have some fun - and of course, for crossdressers. Yes, you can wear any costume you wish - even dress as a woman - and no one will question it. I'm not suggesting that you go out looking really bad - like a man-in-a-dress. No, then you would get some snickers. I am suggesting that you go dressed as a nice representation of a woman. Depending on where you work, you can dress as a Secretary, Nurse, Boss's wife, Housewife, Banker, Lawyer, Doctor, Teacher, etc, etc -- like any woman.
Wherever you work, pick a position that is held by a woman and dress as her. To make it easier, start talking about a Halloween party at your workplace. Suggest that everybody dress as someone else. Suggest that changing roles would make it more of a challenge and suggest that you have prizes for the best imitator. That would give you the perfect excuse to look the best as a woman, without being questioned as to why you look so nice as a woman. Oh, for my excuse, as to why I looked so nice, ( and because my wife didn't want her co-workers to get suspcious) I said that I had my make-up done at a studio because I didn't know how to do it. No - no one quetion that my arms and legs were shaved. I was so worried that I would be grilled, but read my story and see how well the entire "appearance" went.
Another theme that you could suggest, at work, is that everyone pick a well-known person (actor, public figure, politician, etc) and dress as them, with the men having to pick a female figure and the women having to pick a male figure to imitate. (Now, why didn't I think of this while I was still working???)
OK, enough ideas. Now get yourself started planning - you only have 27 days left.
If you need further encouragement, and haven't read my "Halloween Adventure", fe-mail me and I'll send it to you. I've attached the picture of how I and my wife looked that Halloween.
And once the "ice-is-broken", who knows what doors that will open for you to dress in fem-mode during other times of the year - Mardi Gras, etc - or no special reason.
Enjoy the Treat of your life!
Teri
Flying en-fem
September 30th, 2010 10:33 pm MDT
Hi Girls, many of you know that one of my goals is to go flying en-fem - not commercial, but simply with my flying club. I fly small airplanes. One big reason, for not having flown in fem-mode yet, is the new snarl of Federal rules for identification, because of terrorism. If I fly in fem-mode, I wanted to just walk in and get the keys and go fly. Well, if I show up in fem-mode and no one recognizes me, they would ask for ID to see who I am and whether I'm an authorized pilot in their club. With all the "rednecks" around, I didn't want to go through that hassle, so I have put off flying in fem-mode. The closest progress I made, towards my goal, was having a discussion about cross dressing with the receptionist. I don't even recall how we got onto the topic. I do remember telling her that I crossdress and would love to come flying in fem-mode some day. Not long after our conversation, she quit working at our club. End of story - almost.
Today, I went in for my BFR (bi-annual flight review). At the end of our hour-long discussion of flight rules and procedures, etc, the instructor/club manager said, "I have one more question. We may as well dispel rumors. Are you a crossdresser?" Wow! Talk about being ambushed. I was absolutely not expecting that question. The old receptionist had left over 6 months ago. I had even forgotten that conversation. What prompted that question? However, even though I was ambushed, I answered without blushing - "Yes, I crossdress." My answer showed no shame, no embarrassment - I answered as if crossdressing was as normal as eating. Then I asked him why he asked that question. He proceeded to tell me that his old receptionist told him. So much for confidentiality. I really should have known better. People love to gossip, especially about unusual items. There are no secrets in this world.
OK, so now the cat was out of the bag. And, as soon as I confirmed that I crossdress, he leaned out of his office door and shouted to the new receptionist: "Jackie, he is a crossdresser!" I didn't see who was in the club at that time, but I know that at least one other instructor was there. (But then, what difference did that make? Apparently, the rumor had been circulating since I spoke with the old receptionist and by tomorrow, I'm sure that all staff, club members and student-pilots will know anyway.) Then he goes on to tell me that Jackie was a professional make-up artist. We then had a long conversation, with the instructor saying, "So tell me how often do you crossdress, etc." Our conversation ended with - would you believe - the instructor/manager telling me that I should come in some time and fly en-fem. He said that if I did it for Halloween, no one would give it a second thought or question it. I explained that my "dressing" is not the same as being in costume for Halloween. I told him that I crossdress because that is who I am - I don't "dress" for show, for amusement or just for Halloween. I said that I dress to be Teri, not a man-in-a-dress. I explained that if I ever come in to fly in fem-mode, I would do so because that is how I now live most every day, not because I pick a day to "dress up" to have some fun.
The instructor had other people waiting for him, so I then spoke with the receptionist. She checked my face and said that she liked how I had thinned my eyebrows, then suggested that I should use false eyelashes when I "dress". I told her that with the mascara I use, my lashes look much better than they do at the moment. Jackie asked what brand of makeup I use, etc, etc. She offered to do a makeover on me. Now we just have to find a spare moment when she can do it. That will be a hoot - getting a makeover from the flying club receptionist, where I was still afraid to fly em-fem - until now!
While the instructor was still busy, I leaned over to the receptionist and told her: "If you don't make any comments, I've got some pics I can show you of my fem-mode. I then showed her some pics and she looked truly amazed, stating: "You look totally different and so nice. You really know how to do this. I would never have recognized you, had you come in like that." She said that of my three hair colors, she preferred the red hair. She then told me that I should show her boss (the instructor/manager) my pics. I told her I shouldn't show him the pics because I want to walk in unannounced some day and see whether he recognizes me.
When the instructor was done talking with the other people, he came back to us and asked more questions. I said that I had a confession to make. I told him that I actually came in one day as Teri. I told him (and Jackie) that I had left my logbook in the office after a flight and called the office saying that my wife was in the area and would stop by to pick it up. I related how I came into the office (posing as the wife) and said I was there to pick up Ted's logbook. A male receptionist said he would retrieve the book. I told how the receptionist went into the staff lounge, and apparently, told the staff to 'come out and see the chick'. (That was in my days when I still dressed a bit too fancy for daytime casual, so I looked particularly nice (short skirt & blouse), compared to other women who showed up at the club.) I said that I remembered the staff suddenly all filtering into the office, as if each one was looking for some paperwork, while casting long glances in my direction - (dirty old men). (OK, I should have been flattered, but actually, I got a bit of the feeling that women get when they get stared at by men. I felt as if they were "undressing" me.) I asked whether he ever heard that I was in the office in fem-mode. He told me that he never heard about it, saying that I must have "passed" so well that no one recognized me. Immediately, the receptionist interjected - "Tim, Ted has some pics on his cell, of him as Teri. I said that I wanted to surprise him some day, so I didn't want to show him my pics. Well, he begged me to show him, so I did. He marveled at the pics, saying he couldn't believe it was me. [Thank you!] He and the receptionist then wanted to know what type of bra inserts I use - what size they are, etc, etc. Tim even said, "So what size bra do you wear - double D?" I told him that I wear a 38-D. Finally, Jackie said, "I think that Tim would look good, dressed as a woman." Tim only replied that he didn't have a high enough voice to dress as a woman. (I think that he has a soft face and I certainly got the idea that Jackie's suggestion intrigued him.) I replied, "OK, if you "dress" for Halloween, I'll stop by and we'll fly out for lunch." Jackie thought that was a great idea.
Wow - all this feminine talk in the last place on earth I would have expected to hear it! Needless to say, I promised that I would stop by to fly, in fem-mode, not for Halloween, but sooner. I floated out of the office on a pink cloud of feminine ecstasy!!!
Now I'm counting the days until I get another opportunity to go flying - and yes, my very next flight will be as Teri! I've been waiting so long to do this and finally the door has opened. After my first fem-flight, I don't think there will be anymore fights in male-mode. Oh the joys of femininity! If the instructor is not busy, I'll tell him that he can treat me to lunch at whichever airport I fly to. Wow! Am I excited??? YES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Alright girls, it's been way too long since I've heard from some of you, telling us of some new adventure you've tried. Make it your goal to do something new, as a woman, in this new month!
Cheers!
Captain Teri
Another adventure
September 12th, 2010 7:00 pm MDT
Hi Girls, spending most of my days now in fem-mode is bringing more new adventures - things that aren't part of ones daily routine, but things which we will encounter, if in fem-mode long enough.
Last week, Teri went looking for an RV with her/my spouse. We spent all week looking and then made the purchase - yes, all in Teri-mode. Shopping for an item as expensive as this, was a new experience. You don't go out and ask no questions, when planning to spend this kind of money, so there was alot of talking that I had to do - in a fem voice, of course.
Each RV dealer treated us with respect and courtesy. I don't know which ones figured out my status, but if they did, they did not let it show. When we made our decision, as to which coach we would buy, I went back alone, as Teri, to negotiate a price. His reply - "You drive a hard bargain." It was at the end of our negotiation that I confided that I am a crossdresser. He seemed puzzled, so I explained that, although I mostly dress as a woman, I am a male. He smiled and said, "You look nice." Had I not told the dealer about it then, he would have discovered it the next day, when we had to return (with our IDs) to sign the contract and the DMV paperwork.
I asked the dealer whether he ever realized that I was not a woman. He told me that when we entered his lot, he had no clue. When he saw us, as two women, he had no other thoughts (ya sure - all dirty old men do). Once I started to ask alot of questions, he thought that we were related somehow. I assume by that statement that he thought we might be sisters, etc, or a gay couple. I told him that my wife is still a bit shy about us going out as girlfriends because she thinks that everyone instantly "reads" me. The dealer said that I convinced him that I was a woman, until I confided otherwise. I told him that he was so kind. I sure wished that everyone was so accepting. I really believe, that in most cases, if we reasonably "pass", only those folks who are looking for the unusual will "read" us. If you aren't expecting something "different", you don't look for it.
I'm passing this on to let you know that even the most unusual circumstances should not be a roadblock to displaying your femininity. Every day, folks are becoming more accepting. Take advantage of that and then help to educate folks about us. But, please remember that the better the image you present, the better you will be accepted and the better our image will become in the eyes of the public. I'm trying to say that when out in public, dress to blend with other women. Don't go out looking like a hooker when grocery-shopping, or when buying a car or RV. Dress appropriately for your age and the surroundings and most folks will accept you. That doesn't mean that they will approve of what you are doing, but approving and accepting/tolerating are vastly different; and, until we are accepted, they will never approve.
After purchasing the RV, we went to a storage place, to rent a spot for the RV. The woman asked my wife: "And who is this lovely lady with you?" So, my wife introduced me as Teri. (From her facial expression, I think that the clerk "read" me, but she acted professional and treated us well.) As my wife was signing the paperwork, the clerk told her that because her husband wasn't along, she (my wife) would have to sign for him also. That comment was a nice gesture - if she knew otherwise. If she "read" me, her statement said, in affect: "OK, if you are presenting as a woman, I won't press the issue and just go along with that and treat you as her girlfriend, not her husband." That was a diplomatic way of handling the situation. So, whether the clerk knew or didn't know - it mattered not. We got our RV space - they got our money. Everyone was happy.
In addition to RV shopping, we went to a movie, shopping and several dinners, last week, all in Teri-mode. That following Sunday, we attended a local church, then had brunch at Lyon's in Sacramento, followed by a stop at the Mall. The pic I've attached shows the new top and one of the two new skirts I got at the Mall. It was a femtastic week!
Oh yes, Teri will share most of the time with her spouse in the RV; after-all, Teri bought it, so Teri should get to enjoy it. Husband-days will occur only when circumstances absolutely require it. Don't want to give the in-laws a heart-attack at their age.
Promise yourself to do something unusual, even something exciting this Fall - in fem-mode. Stop living in fear. Share your feminine-self with others - it will add enjoyment to your life and the world will seem a brighter, a happier place to dwell. Hold your head up high and give them a big smile. A smile will disarm your worst opponent and make you feel good about yourself. Be proud of your femininity and don't forget to act lady-like while doing so. Your smile will brighten someones day.
Enjoy your feminine moments!
Hugs,
Teri
Spring update
August 24th, 2010 8:35 pm MDT
The final touches are taking longer than expected, so the landscaper is still here - going back and forth to the store for parts. While he was gone again, I decided that a bit of extra silicone would be enticing, so I got some small inserts and added them behind my 38-C's, probably boosting them to a 38-D. Harding working men should be rewarded, so when he got back, I had a much fuller figure. Do men notice such things?
His wife (before she became pregnant) used to mow our lawn. When he returned, I asked whether, in all the times she saw me in fem-mode, did she ever suspect anything. He told me that she never did - always thought it was my wife she was talking to. (Cheers for all the makeup advice I got from folks like you - and then much practice). We chatted several minutes about crossdressing and I told him that I crossdress because I enjoy it, even though some of my family greatly disapproves. He confided that he had a brother who is gay. Consequently, he has learned to be tolerant. I guess that includes being tolerant of crossdressers, because his happy demeanor did not change.
A few minutes ago, after paying him for the finally completed job, he called back to say that my bank would not accept the check I wrote because I added the word "Landscaping" behind his name. He said that his account was not set up that way. If he was trying to get cash, it doesn't matter how his account is set up, as long as his name was correct. Last week, the bank called me to verify whether I wrote him a $1000 check, which I confirmed. I think the bank could have done the same this time. Perhaps it was an excuse he used to come back and talk to me again. Maybe the larger chest caught his attention and he wanted another look. (Wishful thinking)
Now go make someone life's happy, then let them know that you enjoy the fem life.
Teri
I wore a summer dress which you may find in the photo section, except that I had red hair today instead of blonde.
Summer update
August 24th, 2010 3:24 pm MDT
Hi Girls, I've been so busy this year. I think that I need to get a full-time job so I can have some free-time. Amongst all the activities, I am enjoying my fem-mode more than ever. I think I will hate moving because I have established such great rapport with our neighbors - and clerks in various department stores. And I even found at least one church where they welcome me, knowing my TG status and can visit other churches because I don't announce that I'm a CD. I just go as a woman and let folks think whatever they want. However, we do need to move to take care of our parents.
This week I experienced another "first". I had to go to Kaiser to pick up a prescription. Because I am daily in Teri mode now (with rare exceptions for family crisis health issues), I decided that I would go as Teri. The Rx was for my wife. Only a couple of people gave me the jaundiced eye - most only glanced at me in passing. One woman did stare at me and then whispered to her daughter. Gee, I wonder what she said. My biggest risk was meeting someone I know, but then most folks wouldn't recognize me in fem-mode, especially because with my heels I am 3 inches taller. Many faces appear familiar to us, but if the size or weight doesn't match, we think it's a different person. And had I met someone, I was prepared to tell them that this is the nicer side of me that they have just met. No, I don't plan to sneak away and avoid them. I enjoy my fem-life and am proud to be out, presenting as a woman!
When I got to the Rx clerk, I handed her my wife's Kaiser card. She then asked for a photo I.D. I showed her my D.L. and said, "Bad DMV picture - like they are famous for." She gave me a very pleasant smile and processed my transaction, then smiled again and wished me a nice day. Why can't everyone be that accepting? It sure would make the world a nicer place!
Next week, I'm doing another "first". Today I called my hairdresser, telling her that I need a haircut. I told her that because I am now daily in fem-mode and did not want to change just to get a haircut. I wanted to know whether I could come in fem-mode. Sally said that it would be perfectly fine with her but that she does not know how the the clients would react. Sally suggested that I come in as the last client of the day, telling me that on Mondays no one but her stays late, so I could come in then. I've always wanted to get my haircut in fem-mode. Oh, yes, when in drab-mode, we talk about make-up and clothes, etc, but I think that if I go in in fem-mode, and then taking off only my wig, it will put Sally and I in a different mindset. Talking to me about make-up, when I am in drab-mode, Sally can't say too much - nothing that will alert the other clients that I am a CD, because, in case they object, we don't want her business to suffer. Well, if I'm in fem-mode, especially with no other clients there - perhaps only a stylist or two still cleaning up - Sally can freely talk to me as a woman. We won't have to be careful as to what we say or how loud we talk. I think it will be a truly unique and wonderful experience. Yes, I will keep you posted on how it went and what we chatted about.
So what are you doing for the summer? I haven't heard much about how you all cope with the hot weather. For me - it's sundresses, hot-shorts or mini-skirts. I have a lovely feminine tan-line. Wait until I have to see the Dr. again - the gig will be up. Oh well, at least my Dr. is a woman and I don't have to see my flight physician until next year.
Enjoy your summer and enjoy your feminine moments!
Hugs,
Teri
A Life in Hiding....
June 12th, 2010 2:40 pm MDT
OK, after reading all the accounts of people who "have" to hide their fem life, I've come up with a new slogan:
"A Life in Hiding is Not a Quality Life".
I know, I know - there are a thousand and one reasons why you can't reveal your fem-self to the public, spouse or family. But think about it. Is it really true? Or is the simple answer - FEAR? If you look presentable and blend with other women, the world will not stone you if you are out in public. But it's those fears that keep us in hiding - Fear of what my neighbor might think -Fear of what my co-workers might think - Fear that I might be viewed as a 'sissie" instead of the 'macho' guy everyone thinks I am - Fear that I will not be accepted - Fear that I may lose my job - Fear that my spouse will kill me, then divorce me - Fear that my children will reject me - Fear - Fear - Fear!
I fought all of those fears for too many years and am so glad and relieved that I finally told myself that the worst thing I feared was my willingness to be who I am - that softer, feminine person (Teri), while also being what others view as that "macho" guy (I was a peace officer). Since my family was told about "Teri", we have had our challenges, but they didn't reject me and my wife didn't shoot me. Some relatives think it's wonderful that I have embraced my feminine side - others see it as a curse - but we're still family and true love conquers all. Was it easy telling them? Heck NO! I would rather have faced an armed robber, but I survived. The biggest motivating factor, to tell, was that our son found out through the grapevine and I didn't want that to happen to other family members.
I have written several articles (and there are many on-line resources) which give ideas of how to "come out gently" to your loved ones.
If you fear telling them, just think how you will feel when they "accidentally" discover your feminine side. IT'S NOT A MATTER OF "if", BUT "when". There are a million things going against you, to keep your crossdressing a life-long secret - an accident while driving crossdressed - a severe, sudden illness/accident at home, requiring hospitalization via ambulance, while you are crossdressed - an unexpected early return of your spouse or other family member, because of an illness/accident - being recognized by someone (co-worker, pastor, banker, neighbor, even a relative) while you are out crossdressed - or being the victim of a crime, while crossdressed, away from home.
Just think of the questions you will have to answer when "accidentally" discovered. If you tell, you can lead into it slowly - over several days or weeks. If you get discovered, you will have about 2 seconds to come up with an explanation and because you will be shocked at being discovered, you will be so nervous that your explanation will sound weird/awkward at best. And then you will have to scramble to find some material for your wife to read, which will explain that you are not a pervert or some sexual deviant. It's much better to get all that material now, so that you can give her a bit to read now and then, educating her as to what crossdressing is, rather than waiting for when you are in panic-mode.
I urge all of you, if you go out "dressed" to confide in your spouse so that there will be no surprises. If you confide in her, she will admire that you trust her enough to humble yourself and tell her about your personal feelings. NO, she won't leave you, unless she never really loved you anyway.
If you want help in telling your wife/family, I'd be happy to give you some ideas or send you some articles on the subject. One suggestion - use Halloween to your advantage. It's the one day when anything goes and you can always claim that your name got drawn, at the office, as the person who has to dress as the secretary, then ask your spouse for help in pulling it off. Besides seeing you in fem-mode for the first time, most women get a kick out of transforming their hubbies into a woman for a day. What woman hasn't wished that her husband should have to walk a mile in her shoes or wear a tight girdle or bra, to experience what they have to endure for the sake of fashion?
Let your life shine as a bright star, instead of being a black hole in the universe.
Hugs,
Teri
A Response to a recent on-line question.
May 6th, 2010 11:12 pm MDT
On another site, the question was asked, "How do you leave your house when "dressed"? Their concern was how to get out of the house with close neighbors possibly watching. Here is my answer:
OK, so how do I leave my house when "dressed"?
VERY CAREFULLY - AT FIRST!
OK, before getting to the stage of boldly leaving my house, instead of sneaking out, I had already been going out in public, shopping, dining, etc, as Teri for several years. I had my makeup lessons and bought appropriate clothes. I always try to look very nicely made-up and dressed fairly conservative. I did not want to draw undue attention. If someone looked at me, I wanted it to be because they admired how nice I looked. I did not want to be looked at and thought of as a man in women's clothes. That does not mean I "pass" 100%, but I do my best, so that when peole see me in femme-mode, even if they "read" me, they must admit that 'this person did a good job of emulating women.'
I did too many years of sneaking out of my house and finally decided - the hell with that. I started by appearing in femme-mode around the house - front yard, going across the street to get the mail, etc. My first appearances were quick and scary.
I remember my heart pounding and while standing at the mailbox, I would almost panic if a car drove by. Finally, my fears subsided. The sky didn't fall on me and those who saw me didn't shoot me. After several times to my mailbox, when a car drove by I would look. If it was a neighbor I knew, I would wave. Instead of parking my car in the garage, I now started to park on the driveway, so that when I left the house, en-femme, the neighbors could see me as I got into my car.
My next big step was to take my dog for a walk during the dinner-hour, or just before sunset, when no one would be outside. I saw some people looking out the window, so I know I had been seen. Of course, from that distance, it's hard to tell what you are looking at and figure out who it was; so I wasn't too worried. The evening walks worked only for so long before someone was out in the yard and saw me up close. They smiled - I smiled back and continued. As my walks continued, I began to meet some neighbors also out walking. I could tell that they were taking second looks. Did they "read" me or think it was my wife, as most have not met her? It didn't matter. I was determined not to let a few looks deter me.
After a few months of evening walks, I changed my walking time to late mornings and mid-afternoons. As I met more people and many of the same people on a daily basis, they started saying Hi and commenting on my cute dog. Well, I had to reply, so in my best feminine voice I would thank them and wish them a good day. If they "read" me, they did not let it show. That encouraged me. No one threw rocks at me, so my walks continued. And then the days arrived when my closest neighbors would be leaving their houses just as I hit the sidewalk and see me. For those who have followed my blurbs, you know the story - some neighbors would turn around and drive by a second and third time, just to get another look and confirm it was me. After a close look, while driving past me twice, a neighbor confronted me about it, at the mailbox, asking whether it was me she saw, dressed as a woman. We discussed crossdressing. I didn't die, it gave me the courage to
continue and not worry about being seen.
I finally decided that because I wasn't doing anything illegal - not even paying my taxes late - what could happen to me? - Nothing. Long story short - for the past 5+ years, I have been going out in my neighborhood without any fear or concern. I now regularly chat with women I meet on my walks. (Oh, the men out walking also say Hi.) We talk about the weather, our dogs, etc. In fact, unless I'm really missing their signals, most have not "read" me.
Now, that doesn't mean that all has been roses. You may remember that one distant neighbor called the police because "a crossdresser was heading to the park and the children could be in danger." OK, so they called the cops. The police told her that crossdressing was not illegal. When out on my walks, I love it when some guy drives by and within a minute I see him pass two or three times. I know that he is making u-turns and coming back for another look. And on some occassions, I get a whistle or two from a passing cars when the high school lets out.
Listen girls, I found that the biggest fear we must face is our own fear of showing who we are. Yes, you will have to work up the courage and start with little steps, but get out there and let the world see you. If you look presentable - if you blend - if you dress appropriately for your age and the surroundings, instead of looking like a hooker - then you should fear nothing.
I've had one complainer and one incident of the distant neighbor bringing her kids to my house to knock (more like kick) on my door to intimidate me. I called the police. So now even my local police - all the way up to the Chief - know that I'm a crossdresser - and I'm still alive. Heck, the cops now wave as they drive by. If the cops are on your side, you've got it made. Don't be bashful in asking for their help if you run into any serious harrassment. If you have to call the police, just tell them that you are the victim of a hate-crime. No department wants to be accused of ignoring such complaints. Don't be afraid to tell them that you are a TG and occassionaly/ frequently go out crossdressed and would like to be able to do so without being subjected to harrassment. My police dept was most helpful to me. Hey, and they now know that I'm a retired Peace Officer - and yes, a crossdresser.
Get out and enjoy your feminine moments. If you go out boldly, instead of sneaking out, you are telling your neighbors that you are not ashamed of what you are doing or who you are. If you feel good about crossdressing, chances are they will too. If you hide or sneak out, trust me, they see that and then you are projecting that you think crossdressing is bad. This will only serve to reinforce their preconceived ideas about crossdressing. Don't do that to yourself. Live free as they do. Live as you wish. The sun will shine much brighter on you if you do. Now go forth and conquer! With alot of initial fear, but also with much persistence, I'm finally at the stage where I come and go as Teri, on a daily basis - and all the effort was worth it!
Life worth living is a life with challenges!
My Newest Novel -
April 22nd, 2010 4:33 pm MDT
Hi Girls,
As a diversion for some of the stress, brought on by some distant neighbors, I have written another novel. This one has been published by Mags Inc, from whom you can purchase it for only $10.
"High Plains Twister" is a novel about two kids who grew up in the high plains of Kansas - part of "tornado alley". Brother and sister find themselves in a slightly different adolescence than most kids, but both find their dreams fulfilled through a whirlwind of circumstances. Their twist-of-fate rivals any twister found on the Plains where they live.
Enjoy this tale of twisted desires!
Transgender magazines, Transvestite and transsexual illustrated fiction, TV TG stories from Mags Inc.
www.magsinc.com/newstuff.html -
____________________________________________________________________________
In spite of the recent stress from those neighbors, I continue to enjoy life in Teri-mode. With the warmer weather, wardrobe choices are expanding and I'm looking forward to the days of spaghetti-strap dresses and cool tops! I hope your days are filled with warm feminine experiences!
Police reply
February 8th, 2010 8:21 pm MST
Hi Girls, I outlined the events of the past year to our local Police Chief. I was surprised and pleased that within 30 minutes he was corresponding with me via several e-mails. He told me that he passed on my information to his Investigation and Patrol Commanders, so that will be aware of this. At least there are some enlightened folks in our community. Now I hope that nothing else comes, but if something does, at least the police will have the background to evaluate before taking action against me because of some bogus complaint, made in retaliation by a disgruntled neighbor. Go forth and conquer!
Not all Roses
February 8th, 2010 2:18 am MST
Hi Girls, First, I had a super day, attending church in Teri-mode and then finding an adorable, sexy, hot knit-dress at Macy's --- for a unbelievable sale-price of $9.99 ! --- Now on to something less exciting. --- Although what I am going to tell you is very negative, I'm passing it on in hopes of encouraging you all not to be deterred by obstacles on your feminine path. --- You may remember that last year, about April, a neighbor called the police and told them that they feared for their 9-yr old son's safety and for the safety of kids in the park nearby. They told the police that I was walking my dog while crossdressed. Yes, that fact alone led them to make the "safety" complaint. Apparently, the police told them that I was doing nothing illegal and to call if they observed a crime being committed. Subsequently, another neighbor talked to the complaining lady and told her to chill out. I thought that was the end of it - until last night. --- Last night, my neighbor was taking out some trash when he heard a bunch of kids talking on the street. Thinking that this was highly unusual, especially after dark, he looked over his fence and saw approximately 15 kids assembled on my yard. He listened and heard one of the boys say: "Let's get this guy. He wants to rape me." Next, my neighbor heard the kids pounding on my front door. Grabbing his cell phone, he proceeded out of his yard to confront the kids. Low and behold, there was an adult woman with them. He asked what was going on and she brushed it off as, "The kids are just having fun, doing a a 'ring & run' at peoples; houses." My neighbor went inside and called the police, reporting what had happened. --- Meanwhile, I heard a knock at my door. I ignored the knock because I didn't want to answer the door, as I was "dressed". Suddenly, there was a loud pounding on my door. It sounded as if someone was trying to kick in my door. Frightened, I ran to grab my gun and returned to the door. I peeked out of a window first, but saw no one. I didn't know what to think. --- A few moments later, my neighbor calls and relates what he had observed. I called the police, stating that I was the victim and that I had an idea about what happened. (The neighbor had given me the name used by the woman when he asked her who she was.) I spoke to the officer who had come out on the call and had contacted the group on the street. I told him that I crossdress (as therapy from career-stress) and that someone had complained about it. I told him I suspected that the group who came to my house was connected with that complaint. --- Today, I Googled the White Pages and checked the house number where the complainant lives. Sure enough, I found that 'Susie Q' (who identified herself to my neighbor) lives at that address. I called the police back and told them that I considered what happened last night as a hate-crime. I told him that this group did not knock on any other doors - only mine. --- I told the officer that if he checked the Complaint Log and looked up the address from the woman who made the 'safety' complaint against me last year, that he could verify whether it was the same person. Under those circumstances, I told the officer that what happened last night was not a dumb childish prank - it was a planned, targeted event. I told him that it was a hate-crime - an act done to intimidate me. --- I mentioned that the woman was guilty of 3 crimes for what happened last night. She was guilty of Malicious Mischief; Contributing to the Delinquency of a Minor; and Conspiracy. Conspiracy because she planned, with the kids, what they were going to do. Heck, she led them right to my house. I call that participating in a crime. My neighbor saw her watching the kids as they almost kicked in my door and when confronted, she admitted it. --- I told the officer that I want him to talk to this woman and tell her that the only reason I'm not having her arrested is because I'm being gracious as a neighbor, realizing that we all do dumb things sooner or later. But, I want her to know that she cannot take the law into her own hands. I also told him to inform the woman that I would continue to walk my dog past her house, x-dressed or not, because I was not doing anything illegal in doing so and if that bothers her, then she should stop looking out of her front windows. --- Oh, I wasn't done yet. I told the cop that I want him to make a note and inform his superiors that I suspect that this woman may retaliate and concoct a story and file false charges against me, IE: trying to lure children (her son), etc. I informed him that if she ever makes a criminal complaint against me, that before they come out and arrest me, they should have a higher-ranking superior review the complaint and evaluate it in light of her past history and to grant me the courtesy of an interview to get my side of the story. I hope he makes those notes. The officer assured me that he would have a 'come-to-Jesus' talk with her. I hope he does that. --- So, if I face these kind of challenges and it doesn't intimidate me, I'm thinking that your challenges are not as serious - so whatever your challenges, face them, don't hide from them and get out to enjoy your feminine self. --- After getting these issues resolved around here, I'm going to have to start all over again in a new neighborhood, if we move this year, as planned. Yes, we have to move to where our parents live, as they are starting to need us more often. Dad will be 90 this summer, so we've been fortunate that our emergency-trips have been few so far, although other visits have taken up alot of our time. --- Be safe. Keep your eyes open and beware of your surroundings - people & cars around you ---- BUT: --- Keep your chin up, walk tall and put a B I G SMILE on your face. Life is great! Feminine life is even better! Don't let anything ruin that. --- Cheers, Teri
Jan 2010 update
January 25th, 2010 2:32 am MST
Hi Girls, I thought it was time to let you know that I’m still around enjoying the fem-life. During the last few months of ’09, I was extremely busy with family and business issues. First, our daughter and son each bought their first house. For our son, we did not have to help him with moving, etc. For our daughter, it was a different story. She works so many hours per week that she has very little time for anything else, so we helped her to pack up, move and get settled into her new house. Of course, with a house come chores, so we spent alot of time fixing things, hanging up pictures, getting an alarm system installed, etc, etc – and all this just before Christmas. Yes, she wanted to have her home ready for the Christmas holidays and we barely made it. In addition to all that, because I manage a couple of rentals, I was also busy selling a rental that was not doing well for the owner. Because we also manage the rental where our daughter lived, we had to find new tenants when she moved out. Now we’re busy trying to find a replacement rental in a better location, to replace the one that sold in December. OK, enough of that. You may remember that before all that happened, that during the summer I had told our daughter and two nieces about my TG lifestyle. One niece (my oldest niece) strongly objects and the other niece is totally supportive. For those who hadn’t heard – In the Spring, our son learned, through the grapevine about my crossdressing. In order for our daughter not be blindsided like our son was, I decided to tell her. When our son found out about my crossdressing, he blew off alot of steam, but then settled down, telling me that nothing had changed in our relationship and that he still loved me. Our daughter did not take the news as well. She’s mad, upset, confused and told me that it has affected our relationship. To date, she has not asked for any reply to her initial questions/objections. Because she was going through the stress of renegotiating her job-contract and then buying her first house, I did not pursue giving her an answer. A couple of weeks ago, while staying with our daughter, I decided one day to manicure my nails. The only polish I could find had a light pearl gloss to it. I put it on just before going to see the Harlem Globetrotters. During the evening, I could see that our daughter kept eyeing my hands. In the restaurant, she got a good look at my nails. When we got home, she stated, “What’s with the pearl fingernail polish? That’s not appropriate. I’m sure that I have some clear polish around here.” I replied that I used what I could find. Within a few minutes, she had brought a bottle of polish remover and some clear, El, nail polish to our bathroom. Wow! That really surprised me. I would not have been surprised had she just said that nail polish was not acceptable on my nails [in drab-mode], but to say that she thought that she could find some clear polish, and then bringing it to our bathroom, totally surprised me. To me, this showed that she has lightened up on her initial condemnation of my crossdressing. And more than that, it seems to indicate that she is acknowledging that my crossdressing is not going to stop. To me, this was a huge leap forward. I hope that soon we can have a discussion about it all and I hope that she realizes that nothing in our relationship/trust has to change. I hope that she understands that I am still the same person who raised her, loved her and supports her and always will. For those who are facing similar challenges, I hope this encourages you to enjoy your feminine side regardless of what you think family will say about it. No, don’t flaunt it in their faces, but don’t let them make you a prisoner in your own home. With mutual respect, I believe your fem-self and your family relationships can exist and flourish. Now, go out and enjoy some wonderful feminine moments. Life is too short for regrets.
