Cindy
"This group is so positive, I'm glad I was able to find it. You gurls and admires are great."
Journal Entries for Cindy
How to be a lady, but still be naughty
November 15th, 2009 9:43 am MST
This is just a thought for the day. Something I was thinking about. When I go out dressed I like to look sexy and alluring. I get good compliments, but it is strange still. Do any of you gurls go out and maybe don't realize you look sexy.
I think we gurls and all girls judge themselves to harshly. We all probably look better then we think. Then this comes to another probelm. If a gentleman is giving you attention, how to act? I have not been a woman as long as real women, so I am not so skilled at begin demure. Also since I"m not 24/7 I cannot go on a few dates in a week or two to build a relationship. Some girls wait a while before being intimate, others don't.
How are you suppose to know, this is a good person? Are they safe? Disease free? Drug Free? What have been some of your exerpiences. Also you admires, how have you felt we gurls acted. Do like it when they super slutty or do you then think they won't be faithful in a relationship, or do like to take is slow to build the relationship, so intimancy can be more meaningful.
I am going through a lot of new feelings, and I like to be naughty, but I still want to be a lady too. The balance is something I think I will learn over time.
Huggs all,
Cindy
The slow transition
November 3rd, 2009 8:36 am MST
OK, I have a post on what I would call the slow transition. How many of you gurls out there are doing that. It is when you feminize your body slowly over time, without hormones. Then you get a feel about being a gurl before the big plunge.
I am currently working on getting my body hair removed, and growing my hair long. The funny thing is women love the look, if only they knew that I actually working to look like them. I am having laser treatments done on areas the sun don't shine, and waxing the rest. I am saving my face for last since a good close shave and some foundation, can still allow me to look like the gurl I want to be.
Lets face is I can't use makeup to cover hair on any other part of my body. Yet by keeping me face hair, a little stubble and no one would guess I'm transgendered. Great for work. So I'm stubbly for work, since I have to be a guy to make the bucks, yet sexy smooth on weekends.
Eventually I will have laser done to all the hair on my body below the neck. I can further grow as a woman, and see if I build up my confidence enough to then transition. For my the problem with transition, is the fear of redicule and shame if or when I do. So I take it slow, so to prepare myself for which ever way I want to go with transition.
Huggs,
Cindy
Need to go out again
October 29th, 2009 12:23 pm MDT
I think I will be heading out in Tampa on 11/13. Going to Fetish2Fetish. They have this Tea Party that is fun. It is a good chance for me to meet others in the Tampa community. It has been almost 2 weeks since I've been able to dress, and it is bugging me. This gurl needs to get out soon and dance. I am finding the more I go out, the more I miss it. Do many of you gurls feel the same. I am waxing and growing my hair long. i think i can try and straddle both worlds as male and female for awhile. I am not sure about the future, but I do love being Cindy. Huggs, Cindy
My first journal entry
October 27th, 2009 4:01 pm MDT
This is a test journal entry for me. I guess one thing I've learned from this group or site is that many people are supportive us of gurls. I feel the more I explore my feeling the more support I find. I had a drag queen help me out in the spring of this year with my makeup, and now I have helpped another gurl out a few weeks ago.
For my helping other gurls is important for me to grow, just as those before me helped me come out more. For you gurls before me thank you so much. Alice in genderland was a book that helped me realize who I am. I will post more journals, but this is a good start I think.
Huggs,
Cindy
