Journal Entries for Marissa Claire Hayes
Untitled Post
October 14th, 2010 9:56 pm MDT
Hello All!!
Its been a while for me, I back and hopefully back on my why to become the female that I am. Will call next week to go to get hormones, I CAN'T WAIT!!!.
Cring insdie again
March 18th, 2008 4:55 pm MDT
I just need to let some steam off today. It has been a bad day in so many ways, My wife and her neice were upset with each other, I think that has cooled down. Our best freind had her baby today and I am so happy for her and her husband. But I myself was upset, it all comes back to being transgender. Normal people do not understand our inner feelings, they do not know what it feels like to wake up every morning knowing that you are trapped in the wrong body. I have cried so much in my life because of this. Yes we can spend a whole hell of lot of money on hormones, surgurys, mental help, clothing, cring, wishing opon stars. But their is nothing that we can do to become our trueselves because of natures mistake on our body. We will never be able to give birth, which I would give almost anything to do, we were striped growing up of the girly things that we wanted to do because "boys don't do that." Even as adults we cannot do the things we enjoy, it is unacceptable for a man to sew, knit, do hair, makup, gotto to baby showers, and the list goes on because of the world we live in. Many loose everything they have, their home, job, car, savings and worst their Family. And people wonder why so many transgender people feel that the only way they can get away from the daily pain is to take their own lives. WE NEED WORLD ACCEPTANCE NOW. I am one of the lucky ones as I have group of people the is very accepting for who I am, So thank you to all of you. I am not thinking about doing anything bad if you are ready this just letting some steam off.
Corrset
May 27th, 2007 6:22 am MDT
I was wondering if anyone knows where I can get a corrset that will truly give me a hourglass shape? Please help if you can, I have to straight of a torso and need it shaped. You can email with response at ambergirl1978_2003@yahoo.com. Thank youMarissa
Merry Christmas
December 24th, 2006 11:56 am MST
Merry Christmas to all the wonderful people on URNOTALONE. I am depressed again this year, but it is all my fault. I am not open about being TG. I comes from not being able to express myself as being the female that I am. Hopefully next year I will be able to show at my family feast I beaitful happy woman. Merry ChristmasMarissa
Poem
November 10th, 2006 9:29 pm MST
Hello All my wonderful wife wrote this poem and I thought I would share it with everyone. Gilded CageShe lives in a closet,Like a bird in a cage,Waiting on a miracle,To unlock her rage,Boxes piled high,Waiting on a sign.Holding her hopes and dreams,Never to be seen.Locked behind a door, her tears litter the floor.One day she’ll leave the black doors of jail,Forever to fly, forever to sail. ~Tammy Hayes
First Time out by myself
September 17th, 2006 7:03 pm MDT
Hello Everyone. I went out for the first time Saturday by myself. It was great of course I was a little nervos at first but quickly got over it. I have been out before with others. I wanted to see how it felt to be alone around men and women, nobody said anything out of the way to me and was addressed as a woman all night by everyone I came into contact with. Hopefully I will be able to do this more often soon. When my wife gets pragent I will start the change to show the outside world that I am truly a woman and I will leave the rest of my life as a woman. I CAN NOT WAIT MUCH LONGER.Marissa
