URNotAlone

I took a giant LEAP , and who knows where I will Land.

November 8th, 2007 6:52 pm MST

    Well, on LAST HALLOWEEN, I took a gian LEAP and I still do not know where I am going to land.  I guess, I did not realize how big of a deal it was going to be for me to show up at work dressed-up!  It was like I was cloaked in flames or something?  I mean people totally freaked, it was insane.  I could have not written something that good.  Well, I could have, I can write pretty good, but you get the point.  I've always wanted to go to work dressed-up.  Oh, hell, even the drive to work was fun.  I was an hour late, lmao, I need to get up much earlier if I'm going to be a girl.  I dressed conservative, but I really wanted to wear my new pink hose, as my legs were silky smooth and I wanted to show em off, but I did not.  Well, anyway, I'm a computer guy at a LARGE HS, 1,500 staff & students.  I've told my Brother that I am TS.  But no one else.  Sheesh, this was supposed to be a halloween costume.  So many were nice on that day, but I could see the looks of dissaproval from many of my fellow staff, lol, you know the ones who did not dress up themselves.  No fun types.  And by the end of the day a group of women teachers I was sitting with said not your first time doing this.  Your voice is much quiter, you walk like a girl, you outfit is to good, bla bla bla. It seems I go into girl mode way to easy without realizing it, and I just could not bring myself to do a mockery of a woman dress-up.  Not when that's what I want to be, and adore.  ONE thing I forgot, the county repair men & their damn truck radios! By 9:30 am every school AND the freeking central office knew I had dressed up.  And, of course, they called my mom and dad, and told them, and all the county worker trade men told my brother, cause he is one of them.  Well, shit, I just came out to 5,000 people all in one fell swoop!  More when peeps get home and tell peeps at home.  I do not know wheather to laugh or cry.  I need this job.  I like my job.  But, I guess, I will have to come to terms with being the suspect crossdressing homo.  I'd like to transition there, but I don't know if they would let me, or if they would be nice to me, if I tried.  That would be another county wide code red.  Ah, sheesh.