URNotAlone

Made it to Christmas Break!!

December 23rd, 2007 10:52 am MST

Hello! Well, I made it to Chrstmas break after coming out on Halloween! It was kind of tough there for a while, I mean everyone knows now about me even my parents. Ha, I worried about telling them for years, but lol someone went and outed me to them.  Kinda weird everyone knowing now.  But, I was tired of sitting at home afraid to go out.  Now I go out anywhere I want.  Some people at work are still upset at work, they stop talking and look away when I come by.  Weird.  I kinda think I'd like to transition at work, I want to, I like my job, but I don't want to be the butt of a ton of jokes while I'm trying to get living and acting as a woman down.  I just don't think that they realize how important that this is to me.  My hair is about 11" long now, and I can make it look pretty girly quite easy now! Even went to the mall and had it colored, and my brows waxed.  LOL, the girl could not help herself and gave me girl brows! Ah well, no one said anything at work, so I got a new pair of tweases and keep them nice and in shape.  I really never thoutht I'd have brows like this, but I do!  I had my eyes checked, and am waiting for my colored contacts!  That should make passing much easier! Since, I can ditch my guy glasses! Whew!  I chose blue!!  I wear my hair down to work, and am going to wear my contacts too, make my brows show up even more! I kinda look funny wearing guy shirts and pants!!  I hope to laser off my beard soon, don't know how much that will cost! That will help alot I think.  All my bosses know I like to dress-up, wish they would just say come to work dressed how you want. Actually, I thought I'd never come out and get this far, but somehow I have. I can't believe it.  I thought I was going to be a wanna be MtF forever, but maybe somehow I can pull this off and be a girl.  I don't know how everyone else feels about me at work, and my family, but well I am sure happy about it!! I really tried to fight off being a girl for a long time, but it won.  What can I say?  I guess I was supposed to be a girl.  I'm a quite submissive girl, I love tattoos, and I kinda hope to do some body painting modeling after SRS.  As, well girls seem to be the chosen canvas for that.  And well, if I make it to being a girl, I hope to be chosen for doing some of that! I know, that's silly now, cause it's a long way off.  But, I'm working on being a girl as best as I can.  Soon, I'd love to start on hormones.  Everyone knows about me now, so I see no reason to stop, other than money, until I am legally a female!! I'm such a shy and silly girl, I just cannot believe it's me actually giving it a try to be a girl~!  I hope I get it right!  Grow your hair out first, that's what I did, and it seems to make things go a wee bit easier.  Plus, it's fun to have and play with. Beth Ann