URNotAlone

Mamma Mia

August 8th, 2008 10:11 pm MDT

I just had to write this entry for myself and I hope you enjoy reading it too.   The strangest thing happened last night, and all day I have been trying to make sense of it, my mind has being racing at a rate of a mile a minuet struggling to understand was I outed ? , has a friend stumbled upon my secret desire? And is ready to accept me?   Let me start by reminding you of my position, I am a str8 CD whose wife knows and is accepting up to a point. That is to say up to now , she will allow me dress and just as long as it is in the privacy of our own home and no one else ever finds out about this awful secret.   Yesterday my wife, at my prompting had been to town and bought me a new pair of court shoes for my wardrobe, and there was a plan that I would have spent the evening as my fem. self. However, at around 5 pm the plan had to be shelved as her sister Debbie phoned to say she was in town and would be coming to stay tonight. Debbie is a travelling sales person and stays with us every time she’s in town. I did not mind, as sisters, there very close to each other and I’m happy to see my wife have a good time.   So we all have dinner together and afterwards settle down for a few drinks and a chat, like so many times before.  The conversation flowed and we got to a point where I said to my wife.” we must go to the cinema soon and see Mamma Mia  the summers hit movie” which I thought was would be nice night out for us.   “You can’t go to that “my wife said, she knew by the look on my face I did not know why?” it’s a chick flick”. Was the reason she gave. Before I could disagree, Debbie pipes in “Yes, it’s only all women that are going to see that, it’s a girl’s night out thing” the still puzzled look on face must have been mistaken for disappointment. By Debbie. “Tell you what well do “she adds “Bring your projector and big screen to my house and we’ll watch it on DVD, we can have a party, and have my friends in, you can dress up, we’ll all dress up it will be a fancy dress”. In the split second it took my face to go red, my tlife flashed before me. Has my wife told her? Were the favourite women in my world giving me the green light to join there wonderful fem. world. “You should dress up? “She asked, I’m still too shocked to speak. “You would be the only guy there but we could tell the others you have to stay to look after the projector and we dressed you up, would you do it?” I glanced over at my wife, expecting support, but all she did was continue to smile at me.  At this point the conversation was about 30 seconds old, What was being suggested? .The only thing I could come up with was my wife had told Debbie about my cross-dressing, and my desire to have a night out in a gang as one of girls. I had to figure out the key point of this very quickly. It was to be a fancy dress party, no problem there. You can dress up. Was Debbie saying I could come as Jennifer? You should dress up. Was Debbie saying this is your chance to come out? We dressed you up. You can pick out your own cloths , do your hair and makeup and well say we did it? This was the only explanation I could come up with. I was in mind overload and need to get out of this fast. I must be getting to wrong somewhere, I decided to try get some thinking time by saying “Mamma Mia is not out on DVD yet” to whitch Debbie replied “, why don’t you both come to my house Saturday night, and we can have practice run ?”. I said I was due to work this Sunday, “try and get off we should really do this”. I left the room to get another drink for them and when I returned the conversation had moved on, but Debbie did remind us of Mamma Mia night before we went to bed ,and again as she was leaving this morning.   Just had to tell this story.