URNotAlone

From Ape to Babe, Ramblings in Photo-Editing

June 4th, 2008 11:24 am MDT

From Ape to Babe – How Far Should a Cross-Dresser go with Digital Photo-Manipulation?

In the Beginning There Were Men Trying to Look like Women…

As soon as digital photography became available to the masses, I am sure that all of us, cross-dressers, saw and took advantage of an opportunity that was near the top of our wish list (second only to the temporary-transformation pill).  At last, we would be able to take photos of ourselves without having to take the film for processing and the risks it involved.

Almost a decade has gone by and digital photography combined with the means for creating a female persona to interact with other people like us, has certainly been a dream come true for most of us.  There is rarely a web-based community where TGirls in general and CDs in particular have not created a niche.  MySpace, Yahoo 360, Hi5, Facebook, Flickr, YouTube, to name a few, allow us to have a circle of friends with whom to share this important aspect of our lives.  There are also portals dedicated exclusively to the TG community and here I have to mention Urnotalone as a pioneer and the place where many of us made our debut.  We use our profiles to share and exchange ideas, thoughts, feelings, and, of course, photos with those who understand us in every way because they have the same passion we have for transforming ourselves into women.

Digital photography is one of the means through which we can share with the world this other side of ourselves and, arguably, the most important (keep in mind that I am talking from a cross-dresser’s point of view).  It is through photos that we show our friends how good and how far are we able to go in our transformation and give or ask for help in improving our image.  We do this within a community of people who know what it is all about and accept us as men trying to look as female as possible.  Having a physical or visual image that matches our pretended gender so that others can relate to this woman they are meeting and with whom they are developing a friendship is very important.  How many times have we come across a profile that says that the owner will not add any faceless person as a friend?   Yes, it is important to have a face and, even better to have a complete body, to make the woman we pretend to be, appear real to others.  Now, unless we get an opportunity to, eventually, meet in person with all these friends, there is no way we can ever be completely sure that “she” is for real.  Every day we see profiles of people pretending to be TGirls showing photos that are so obviously of genetic females or photos that are evidently photomontages.  Rather than judging these people I’d like to think that in their need to give life to an image that, for various reasons, they are not able to produce themselves, they rely on photos that depict the appearance they honestly wished they had.  After all, we live in societies that, sadly enough, favor beauty over intelligence, values or personality.

In the case of cross-dressers and maybe all other TGirls, beauty is even more appreciated than in the case of real women because we are not only contempt with being able to pass for a female but all the better if we can pass for a beautiful woman.  It is no surprise then, that “beautiful” TGirls are often more popular, praised and admired than those who can totally pass for average looking females or those who are the intellectuals and activists of our community.  There is a strive to look as pretty as possible; in some cases to satisfy our own needs, and I include myself here, and in other cases to gain the acceptance and admiration of the other “girls” in our circles of friends.

 

… Then, Along Came Photoshop and a Dilemma…

 

Another field that developed parallel to digital photography was digital photo editing and its power horse, Photoshop.  Yes, we are talking magic here.  All of us who have come across Photoshop and learned the basics have not been able to resist exploring all the possibilities that are limited only by our imagination and our skills using the program.  The dilemma that we face now is:  Is it valid to use Photoshop or any other photo editing program to touch up our photos?  And if so, how much of that magic should we use without being deceitful or distorting reality?  I am sure that there are diverse opinions and points of view in this regard and following I will try to give you my outlook on this topic and will illustrate with examples whenever possible.

 

… To Deceive or not to Deceive… That is the Question.

I started using Photoshop to eliminate red eye and to correct the color and exposure of my photos.  Then, I used it to eliminate chest hair when I wore revealing tops, and leg hair when I did not wear double hose.  I did not consider this practice deceitful since it was the equivalent to shaving my body. I do not have thick body hair but it sure is noticeable and disgusting and prevented me from wearing more revealing tops and/or skirts with bare legs and sandals.  My wife is not comfortable with me being shaved all the time and since I am a male 99% of the time, neither am I. Consequently, Photoshop provides the best means for me to achieve, virtually, something I can do, in reality, only on rare occasions.  Is this level of photo editing deceitful?  I guess we could consider it a mild deception but don’t all the photos we see on printed advertisement and on beauty magazines have, in most cases, been heavily touched up?  If you think that is not the case, just take a look at the following links and you tell me:

http://blog.sessions.edu/graphic-design/photo-retouching-the-delicate-balance/

In the previous link you see the before and after photo of Faith Hill.  Granted that Faith is already a gorgeous middle-aged woman, they manipulate her photo to make her look a lot younger and shapely.  Notice how her face is made smoother and slimmer as well as her arm.  Also notice how the little hump showing on her back is removed and the clavicle is made less prominent.  I have not read the text of the article sent to me by my dear friend Laura Recinos just recently, but it explains in detail how it was done.  The following link provides even more dramatic examples of how a professional touches up photos from famous people for magazines.  Click on each thumbnail and then roll the mouse over the enlarged photo to see how it was before and then roll out to see the after again.

http://glennferon.com/portfolio1/index.html

As you can see, all wrinkles are gone, boobs are made larger and with more cleavage and every little imperfection is taken care of to present a perfect image.  This is the perfect image we all seek and strive for but, as the Dove commercial, in the link below, clearly states, it is an unrealistic and unattainable beauty standard since it is produced electronically.  Yes, every gorgeous girl with a perfect body, face and hair we see in all sorts of magazine adds is not as perfect as she seems to be.  Having a good raw material to start with makes the task easier but the photos they show us are idealizations achieved through the manipulation of photos of beautiful subjects that are close but not quite there and, in some cases, not even close to perfection, on their own.  Every woman, and I count here TGirls too, would like to have the figure of a Barbie Doll or Jessica Rabbit but we know that their extremely slim waists and exaggerated proportions can only be produced in plastic or drawing and lately, with Photoshop.  Our ideal of beauty has become, thanks to photo editing, quite unrealistic.  Take a look at the Dove commercial now:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hibyAJOSW8U

 

A Justification… or Not.

Where does reality end and deception begin?  In the case of cross-dressers it is very hard to define since we are already being deceitful by presenting an image that is opposite to our real gender.  Wigs, makeup, breast forms, hip padding, corsets, lashes, nails, etc. are the physical tools we use to create an illusion.  What is the difference then, between that and getting similar results with digital photo-manipulation?

If gorgeous models, actresses and singers have their already outstanding beauty electronically enhanced why shouldn’t us, ugly men trying to look like beautiful women, do it too?  After all, we need it a lot more than they do.  Don’t you agree?

If you ask me, I think we are entitled to do it; but how far should we go with it?  In my opinion, we should go as far as to reproduce what we are able to achieve in reality if we have the opportunity.  What I mean by this is:  if I know I can look better if I shave my body but can’t do it all the time then why not get a virtual shave?  If I know, I can produce a decent cleavage with tape and padding when I get to shave my chest then why not simulate it with Photoshop?  I used to just remove the chest and leg hair with Photoshop until one time, a little over a year ago, that I got to shave my whole body and produced a pretty decent cleavage with tape.  I could not believe my eyes when I saw myself in the mirror and even now, when I see the photos from then (see links below).  

http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=viewImage&friendID=64501063&albumID=1148889&imageID=11241782

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/489126232/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/2420393557/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/999288280/

It was after seeing how natural my tape-produced cleavage looked that I thought I was entitled to get Photoshop implants by either shading the flat chest or by superimposing and blending real boobs from real girls (it just occurred to me that maybe some of the boobies I have used for my photos might have already been touched up LOL).  I will be the first to admit that I have gotten a bit carried away in the chest size and cleavage but if you are going to do it then do it right, don’t you agree?  The links below show a few of the photos where I have incurred in what I like to call “Photoshop Implants”.  Every time I post this type of photos I include a note stating that the breasts are not real.  Please notice the difference with the “authentic tape-created cleavage” shown in the links above:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/2467940763/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/2264700419/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/2067365114/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/739261488/

Up to this point I believe it is still justifiable, in my humble opinion, to use photo editing.  Why?  Because I have proven to myself (I do it first for me not for others) that I can achieve similar results in real life when I get a chance to shave.  By the way, my wife has agreed to let me shave my chest the next time I dress which should be on the second week of June 2008, if all works out as planned.  In order to further illustrate the two levels of photo improvement that I am comfortable posting I prepared an image showing the “hairy” Cristy (ape), the “No Cleavage” Cristy (not so babe) and the “Virtual Breast Augmentation” Cristy (arguably babe).  I recommend you see the original size (if it fits in your screen).  The link is:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/2549828866/

How far should I go?  I’d like you to tell me.  Would you rather see, from left to right, Ape Cristy, Flat and hairless Cristy or Babe Cristy?  In Yahoo 360 you will be able to cast your vote in the poll at the bottom but if you read this in MySpace or URNA, please leave a short note with your point of view in this “shallow” but interesting issue. 

This writing should not be taken for a confession, because I have always made it clear that I am not smooth most of the time and have also included an explanatory note whenever I post photos showing enhanced breasts.  The reason that gave me the idea to write about this topic is that, lately, I have gotten several messages asking me about my new implants and if I am happy with them, how do they feel, etc.  I have also been asked about when am I having my SRS!  It is evident that, as is often the case, we are so busy with other things that we just take a quick look at the photos and do not bother or have the time to read the captions below them.  As a matter of fact I posted a before and after photo almost a year ago when I first started posting photos with “virtual implants” since it has never been my intention to mislead anyone.  For those of you who have not seen it, here is the link (as with the other photos, I recommend you see it in large size):

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/967913811/

I am not an expert with Photoshop and am far from achieving the kind of work shown in the before and after photos seen in the links at the top.  However, I have always been good with computers and have an artistic background that has helped me find my way around the program.  Therefore, I have experimented further and just for fun have explored other manipulations that make me appear to have a more feminine appearance by altering the body shape in my own photos or simply putting my face on top of gorgeous GG bodies (a technique I like to call “virtual body snatching”).  I don’t know if any of those bodies I have used have, in turn, been touched up before but they serve the purpose of having some fun in “wonderland”.   I have shared some of them with close friends but have never posted any before, as I think this is far from reality and something I could not achieve on my own.  In other words, I find these images completely deceptive and would not like to have anyone thinking they are real.  For the first time ever I will post some of them on Flickr but for that I have created a new account in which I make very clear that they are all photomontages or extreme manipulations of my own photos.  Yes, it is fun and gives me great satisfaction but it is not real.  Following is the link to the home page for this Flickr profile.  From there you can go to the photo pages.

http://www.flickr.com/people/27290011@N07/

Also, here is a link to the one photo of this kind I will post in my regular Flickr account:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/cristy98girl/2549828858/

I am fully aware that after seeing these last photos you will be wondering how much of the photos I post in my profiles and my real Flickr account is really me.  It is an acceptable conclusion once I have shown the magic that can be made with just one program and there is nothing I can do about it.  However, as a very dear friend has told me a number of times, my videos are proof of how I really look like and for those of you who are doubtful, here is the link to my YouTube profile:

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=cristy98girl

 

So, After all the Rambling, is There Anything to Conclude?

In conclusion, I think that it is all a game of make believe and as long as we do not hurt anyone else we should be entitled to do whatever we feel appropriate.  In my case, I prefer to be honest and make things clear from the start but can understand how other people go for deception in their attempt to give life to a much needed female persona that matches their ideals and standards.  However, I prefer when they state from the beginning that the photos show how they wish they looked like and not when they try to mislead others into thinking it is really them in the photo(s).  In the case of the latter, the first person they are fooling is themselves but as long as they enjoy it and do not harm anyone in the process, then so be it.

Some of you might agree or disagree with my opinion and you are entitled to it.  I have expressed my very own point of view with regards to this topic and I do the “virtual shaving” and “Photoshoped Implants” first and foremost for my own satisfaction; knowing full well that I can achieve similar results if I get a chance to shave all my body.  In such cases, I have always made it clear whenever I think it might be misleading.  

From now on I might continue posting my “body and face alterations” and my “ virtual body snatching” photos exclusively in the new Fickr account, where I will not post any regular photos of me.  I am still debating if I should post the original next to the manipulation in the case of those photos that are not my own since I have not used them with permission.  I am also debating if I should open the profile to friend adds and the photos to comments but once you read this document, the decisions will have been made and maybe a Pandora Box will be opening.  It seems that in this virtual world our appearance will be composed of our own raw material and our, or other people’s, skills to enhance it.  We will eventually get to the point where it is not only about how good or bad we look but also how good can our photos be enhanced by ourselves or by others.

It seems that I just can’t keep a blog entry short but if you were able to stand the reading to this point, we have finally reached the end :-).  Thank you for your interest and I will appreciate your feedback if you consider it appropriate.

Hugs and best regards to all,

Cristy.